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Bands You Should Hate Instead Of Nickleback

A list of acts you should hate INSTEAD of NICKELBACK includes…

The “Houston Press” has come up with a list of 10 acts you should hate INSTEAD of Nickelback.

Here they are, and why they feel they deserve your hate:

1. Five Finger Death Punch . . . “They sound like a wood chipper plugged into an amp, and are a general embarrassment to metal.”

2. Maroon 5 . . . “Their songs may not all sound the same, but they’re the most unremarkable earworms in modern music, taking everything great about pop music and sucking the soul out of it.”

3. Pearl Jam . . . “Their songs are full of pseudo-profundity obscured by the incoherent warblings of Eddie Vedder. Listening with a 21st-century ear, the music is self-indulgent and intolerable, a kind of angsty white-guy navel gazing.”

4. Pentatonix . . . “Whenever I hear [them], I wanna bang my head between two frying pans because then at least I would hear some bells . . . without the conventional support of things like drums, guitars and keys . . . it all rings hollow.”

5. Pitbull . . . “He’s always pandering to his audience in the phoniest of ways . . . [and he should] stop reducing people to breasts and underwear, [like when] he raps ‘In Lebanon, yeah, the women the bomb.’ Seriously?”

6. Red Hot Chili Peppers . . . “Anthony Kiedis has questionable songwriting capabilities, [and] he only seems to sing about California and relationships gone wrong. It was fun for a while, but at some point, you have to change.”

7. Radiohead . . . “Radiohead is . . . a good band who has been labeled a great band by those who feel compelled to do so, for no real reason at all.”

8. Smashing Pumpkins . . . “It’s amazing that the Smashing Pumpkins are still held in high esteem, given their downward trajectory for the past ten years . . . Billy Corgan still thinks he’s God’s gift to music.”

9. U2 . . . “I totally get why people think Bono is an insufferable ass.”

10. Kanye West . . . Basically they say it’s because hate is Kanye’s fuel, and list some lyrics to back that up. But if hate is his FUEL . . . maybe we should just ignore him. I mean, do we want to feed THE KANYE?

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